Mental Block

 It's in the little things. This thought has been swirling in my mind for the past week. Since my last post, I've been paying attention to the things I do when my mind betrays me. Whether that be in ruminating thoughts or anxiety or even when depression comes).  While reflecting on this, I was reminded of the little things.  People always talk about the little things concerning relationships. It's the small shared moments that make up the sweet retrospective memories. Or it's the little things that each partner does to support the other person. Or it's the friend sending a meme when their friend is having a bad day. But the little things can also be applied to you. The things you can do when your mind is incapacitating your body. This post is to show appreciation and pride in the little things I do that helps me. The little delights that I do for myself. The heartwarming things others have done to/for me in the past that I apply to me now. Let's start with my fa...

 I want to cry.  Everything makes me cry these days. It is as if my heart has a bleeding wound. Constant oozing of something...emotion? Pain? Anger? Sadness? Regret?  I have been struggling with social situations lately. Actually, I think it's since last year when too much loss occurred in my life.  See the problem isn't with me interacting with people or being in group type social environments. And I don't think it's because of the pandemic either. As I am a teacher and teaching is a fairly social job especially when you have to go to work during a pandemic.  Anyway, back to point. I've noticed that group environments are too distracting for me. I can have fun, but I find it hard to make authentic connections. I never used to socialise just for fun. There was always a purpose. When I'm with my friends, it's usually fine. The purpose then is to connect and spend time with them. But when there are people I don't know. I begin the journey to get to know ev...