Mental Block

 It is about time I talk about my mental health journey. Over the years I have always thought that I was quirky but normal. I thought that I just had "an abstract way of thinking and processing". I understood people but people did not understand me. Eventually, I started dating this person. He understood the mind, more than most, and he started explaining myself... to me.  I learned that I had anxiety disorders. I began to be able to assign words to depressive symptoms. I finally had the vocabulary to understand my heart, mind and struggles better. My mind was definitely not "normal".  It explained why I could see the patterns when others couldn't, it explained why I made many mistakes but expressed wisdom. It explained why my thinking was abstract and why I lived outside myself. I was in survival mode. My mind and body did what they did to cope. I redefined myself as anxious but high functioning. Because I learned ways to "cope" and seem normal while ...